Inconvenient as Hell, Why I Came Back to the Catholic Church - 7/24/2026

As I've been telling people, I'm studying the Gospel According to St. John. I've talked a lot about how much I'm gaining from this. Today, I want to tell a little story. For context, let's begin with a passage from the Gospel:

Jn 1:35-39 The next day again John was standing with two of his disciples; and he looked at Jesus as he walked, and said, "Behold the Lamb of God." The two disciples heard him say this, and they followed Jesus. Jesus turned, and saw them following, and said to them, "What do you seek?" And they said to him, "Rabbi" (which means teacher), "where are you staying?" He said to them, "Come and see." They came and saw where he was staying; and they stayed with him that day, for it was about the tenth hour.

There's some beauty there, but I want to hone in on one tiny little detail. Notice, right at the end of this passage, that John recalls the exact hour when he began following Jesus. "For it was about the tenth hour." That's 4 p.m. in our way of telling time. But to me, it's significant that John remembers exactly what time it was. That's where my story begins. I've told bits of my conversion, actually reversion, story before. This morning, I want to tell it again. Just as John remembers specifically what time it was, so do I. When something changes in our lives: the birth of a child, the moment we fell in love, got married, or lost a loved one, the time is sometimes, somehow imprinted on our memories indelibly.

Last September 8th, between 7 and 8 p.m., I was doing what I often do, watching YouTube. I'd gotten burned out on news, and lost interest in a lot of broadcast and cable type programming. Instead, I watch stuff. I watch reaction videos, getting a kick out of generations after my own discovering the music that owned my teen years. I watch cooking, camping, travel, Italian language, and other stuff I like. YouTube's algorithm populates my feed with other, related, and similar channels and videos. There is no explanation within the algorithm for what happened around 7:40. None at all. I'd never watched anything similar, not once.

Google's AI did this pic for me, should I call it: Holy Spirit shines on YouTube?

A video by a young woman, a woman named Justine Donahue, came on. She explained how and why she converted from an Evangelical Protestant to a Roman Catholic. Something in the first minute or so of her message had my attention, and I had no urge to hit the back button to find something else. Her story is a beautiful one. Her channel is called, Theology of Conversion. I'll link to it below. My wife, Caroline, came in from a women's group she meets with on Monday evenings a little after 8, right as the video was ending. I was sitting on the couch; I don't know that she could tell, but I was a changed man. At about 7:50 on Monday, September 8th, 2025, like St. John, I remember exactly what time it was — I was following my Lord and Savior Jesus, the Christ, again. It's not as if an interest had been rekindled and I was thinking about it. No, it wasn't that at all. I was all the way back.

As a Catholic, I do believe that in Baptism, there is an indelible mark, a seal, imprinted on our souls. We are invisibly branded: "I belong to Jesus." It stays with us forever. Faith may wane or go away entirely. But that mark, it remains. I make no excuse for falling away. I fell away for the same reason that I suspect most do: living as a follower of Jesus and a practicing Catholic can be inconvenient. I was about to say 'inconvenient as hell,' then I thought better of it, but maybe 'inconvenient as hell' is the best way to describe it. Sin is easier, more fun, and living sinfully is an easy place to find friends. It was 7:50 on September 8th, and I was back. What to do next?

First, I told Caroline something had changed and I needed to get back to church. After 20 years of wandering in a spiritual desert, I'm sure that was quite something for her to hear. Caroline has a faith I admire. Every morning, she spends a significant amount of time in prayer. For years I've watched and silently wondered to myself, 'Why aren't I doing that?' So, in addition to the Theology of Conversion video, there was the love of my life, for years, modeling a prayerful existence right under my nose, every day a little nudge I could hardly feel, but one I know was, even if unintentionally, real.

One other little 'nudge' I ignored was at the Catholic funeral of my dear Marine Corps buddy, legendary navigator, Red Hollwedel. It didn't escape me, there grieving his loss in a pew, that I would be ushered out in a similar fashion. Would it be just a meaningless show, or would my body there be home, in the place it is supposed to be as it all ends? I didn't recognize it, but the Holy Spirit was calling me right then. At least I did finally get the message.

By Wednesday the 10th of September, I knew the Confession and Mass times at the 3 closest Catholic churches. By Sunday, I'd been to Confession, attended Mass, and received Holy Communion. I ordered a new Catholic Bible off of Amazon, and my prayer and spiritual life began to take shape.

It's important to say, before closing: I was always a believer in Jesus Christ. I was always a Catholic. I was just ignoring it. For laziness's sake? For sin's sake? Honestly, I confess, both. But faith was there inside me, patient... waiting.

It all came together, all at once, all because the YouTube algorithm inexplicably brought things to a head while I sat relaxing on my couch. Inexplicable? You know what, I know there is an explanation? You know and I know it. When the Holy Spirit called, I heard. I listened. I took action. I'm really committed. I won't fall away again if I can help it. Not if I can help it, nope. 

Has the Holy Spirit called you?

Did you hear?

Did you listen?

What are you doing or going to do about it?

Have a great day, friends. God bless.

Theology of Conversion: Justine Donahue

Deepening My Faith: Reflections on the Gospel of John and Encountering Jesus - 7/19/2026

An AI generated image of me, Bible studying. It even has the bald spot in the right place!

Our little Bible study is wonderful. Every day, as I study, cross-reference, and watch videos, I find myself living and breathing sacred scripture. The Gospel According to St. John has always been my favorite. There is a certain beauty, not just in the message. Of course, as a believing Catholic man, a Christian, I find it to be so. But there is also the delivery, the writing. John has a way with words. I've always known that. I've always felt that way. Earlier this year I studied The Gospel According to St. Matthew, then The Gospel According to St. Mark. Both studies increased my faith. There's a line in Mark, it's at 9:24. A father wants his son healed. Jesus tells him, "All things are possible for one who believes." The man replies in what can be a sincere prayer of desire for deepened faith, "Help my unbelief!" The Bible work is deepening my faith. It is helping to find whatever unbelief lives in me, and "helping it."

John is really a different book than the others, and it's clear to me how it's different. That's probably—no, not probably—that's why I like it more than the others. John's gospel was written last of the four. Whether it was written or passed on orally, I don't know what he had access to, but John knew what people had access to in the way of information about Jesus. He must have felt the story the other three told needed something more. I'm going to go out on a limb and say the other three let us get to know Jesus, about his ministry, and about his death and resurrection. John seems to want us to know Him better, and more, John wants us to fall in love with Jesus, and for those of us who love Jesus already, to fall more deeply in love with Him.

Every day I fall more deeply in love with Jesus. Every day I am more devoutly Christian and Catholic because of this time I'm spending in the Gospel According to St. John. St. John has helped my unbelief tremendously.

May I also take a moment and thank my Bible study friends. I am privileged to share this beautiful walk of faith, as we walk with John, with you. I am honored, tickled, and thankful. You bless me and I appreciate it.

Thank you Jesus. Thank you St. John. Thank you Bible study friends.

In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.

Amen.

Approfondire la mia fede: Riflessioni sul Vangelo di Giovanni e l'incontro con Gesù - Versione italiana = 19/07/2026

Un'immagine di me generata dall'intelligenza artificiale, mentre studio la Bibbia. Ha persino la chierica al posto giusto!

Il nostro piccolo studio biblico è meraviglioso. Ogni giorno, mentre studio, faccio riferimenti incrociati e guardo video, mi ritrovo a vivere e respirare la Sacra Scrittura. Il Vangelo secondo San Giovanni è sempre stato il mio preferito. C'è una certa bellezza, non solo nel messaggio. Naturalmente, come uomo cattolico credente, un cristiano, lo trovo tale. Ma c'è anche l'esposizione, la scrittura. Giovanni ha un dono con le parole. L'ho sempre saputo. Mi sono sempre sentito così. All'inizio di quest'anno ho studiato il Vangelo secondo San Matteo, poi il Vangelo secondo San Marco. Entrambi gli studi hanno accresciuto la mia fede. C'è un versetto in Marco, si trova a 9:24. Un padre vuole che suo figlio sia guarito. Gesù gli dice: «Ogni cosa è possibile per chi crede». L'uomo risponde con quella che può essere una sincera preghiera di desiderio per una fede più profonda: «Aiuta la mia incredulità!» Il lavoro biblico sta approfondendo la mia fede. Mi sta aiutando a trovare qualunque incredulità viva in me, e ad "aiutarla".

Giovanni è davvero un libro diverso dagli altri, e mi è chiaro come sia diverso. È probabilmente — no, non probabilmente — è per questo che mi piace più degli altri. Il vangelo di Giovanni è stato scritto per ultimo tra i quattro. Se sia stato scritto o tramandato oralmente, non so a cosa avesse accesso, ma Giovanni sapeva a cosa le persone avessero accesso in termini di informazioni su Gesù. Deve aver sentito che la storia raccontata dagli altri tre avesse bisogno di qualcosa di più. Salirò su un ramo e dirò che gli altri tre ci permettono di conoscere Gesù, il suo ministero, e la sua morte e risurrezione. Giovanni sembra volere che Lo conosciamo meglio, e di più, Giovanni vuole che ci innamoriamo di Gesù, e per quelli di noi che già amano Gesù, che ci innamoriamo più profondamente di Lui.

Ogni giorno mi innamoro più profondamente di Gesù. Ogni giorno sono più devotamente cristiano e cattolico a causa di questo tempo che sto trascorrendo nel Vangelo secondo San Giovanni. San Giovanni ha aiutato enormemente la mia incredulità.

Posso anche prendermi un momento per ringraziare i miei amici dello studio biblico. Sono privilegiato di condividere questo bellissimo cammino di fede, mentre camminiamo con Giovanni, con voi. Sono onorato, lusingato e grato. Voi mi benedite e io vi apprezzo.

Grazie Gesù. Grazie San Giovanni. Grazie amici dello studio biblico.

Nel nome del Padre, e del Figlio, e dello Spirito Santo.

Amen.

Ho usato un traduttore digitale per aiutarmi con la traduzione.

My Prayers After Communion - 7/15/2026

I've got to tell you, since my spiritual renewal, my prayers have been all over the place. For the moment at least, I'm spending a lot of time in scripture. So much so that I'm not doing my Rosary or the Morning or Evening prayers from the Magnificat the way I had been. But, believe me, I'm praying.

I'm going to talk today about an important part of my prayer life: my prayers after I receive Holy Communion, aka the Eucharist. But first, two other things of note:

I love, love, love the Daily Gospel Exegesis Podcast. I discovered it on the Hallow app, but my listening has migrated to Apple Podcasts, where it is available for free. I generally just call it the Daily Exegesis, for short. An Australian fellow (bloke?) named Hayden, a layman, not a priest, each day breaks down verse by verse the Gospel reading used in the Catholic Mass. Today's reading, for example, is from Matthew, Chapter 11, verses 25-27. It is a beautiful prayer that Jesus offers the Father. Hayden explains it beautifully. Toward the end of the podcast each day, if there are any, he will go to the Catechism of the Catholic Church and read related passages as a way to connect the reading to how the Catholic faith is put into practice. When you hear him, while you may disagree with the interpretation, it's hard to argue that Catholicism isn't biblical. Spoiler: it is.

This post is about prayer. The Daily Gospel Exegesis is sometimes 12 or 14 minutes, and occasionally it's 30 or so, depending on the Bible passage for a given day. Here's a link. I recommend it highly as a way to easily inject prayerful reflection and time into your busy day: while driving, walking, or doing the wash. By the way, Hayden's Australian accent and calming delivery will make listening a very pleasant part of your day.

Daily Gospel Exegesis 7/15/2026 

At nighttime, I'm sometimes using a 600-year-old book (young compared to the Bible!) called The Imitation of Christ by Thomas à Kempis. Last night, in a section entitled "On Having Jesus for a Close Friend," he used a biblical example from the Gospel of John 11:28 as instructive: how being near to Jesus changed Mary Magdalene's entire mood in an instant. Having Jesus in my life is making a difference for me, too. I may not be Mary Magdalene, but I am, like her, a sinner. A sinner who found Jesus.

I will admit, not every reflection resonates, but those that do lead me into prayer again and again. I recommend it.

Sorry the picture didn't come out great. This edition is available on Amazon and is very readable. Other translations? Not as much.

To finish where I said I would, I want to talk about my Prayers After Communion. For Catholics, you know there is a beautiful, quiet, and prayerful moment after we receive the Holy Eucharist. Believing as we do that Jesus in John Chapter 6 instructed us literally, we believe we have just received Jesus: Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity. This is an important and meaningful moment—a time, in Communion with Christ, for deep and personal prayer. So, what to pray about? A lot of us have prayer lists: people we pray for and about. I have one. This is NOT what I pray after Communion. After receiving the Eucharist, I come back to my pew, kneel, and pray like this:

In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit,

Jesus, please let this Communion bring me closer to you. Be in me, and leave your Holy Spirit with me after this Communion, that I might be the kind of follower I should. Lord, I belong to You and I know I ought to live in a way that pleases You, my Lord Jesus Christ.

My Lord, Jesus Christ, please make me a better Husband, father, son, brother, grandfather, Father-in-law, nephew, cousin, and uncle to all my family. Please make me a better person, Christian, and human being. Please help me to be better.

I ask these things in your name, Lord Jesus, as You live and reign with the Father and the Holy Spirit, forever and ever.

In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.

That's how I pray after Communion. Yes, I ask for all the stuff everyone else does in my other prayers, but post-Communion for me is a moment of surrender—to acknowledge Him and to ask for help to be who it is I want and need to be to better please Him.

Have a great day, friends. May you all be richly blessed.

In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit,

Amen.

Blogger's Remiss and John, Chapter 1 revelations - 7/8/2026

I admit it. I haven't kept up with this blog very well. I committed to making a post at least once a week. Here it's been two weeks and two days. And I think this post may take a bit more than just today to get out to you. I own it. But, not to worry, it's not as if my spiritual journey has been on hold, it's just the blogging bit. So, for all who may perchance see this, I apologize. Here's what happened:

I probably found this more interesting than many of you might. I get that. This was a great piece to add to the puzzle that is My Faith Journey.

The blog started slipping from me first when I concentrated on finishing Brant Pitre's "Jesus and the Jewish Roots of the Eucharist." I had started the book a week or two before, but about the time of my last post here, June 22, I found myself unable to put it down. You see, the interconnections between the Gospel and the Old Testament always more than spark ordinary interest in me. They fascinate me, I find them compelling, captivating. I will admit, some of his theories can border on esoterica, but in the big scheme of things, I came to understand many of the connections between the Old and New Testament in a richer and more meaningful way.

Then the little Bible Study group I had dreamed of hosting not only started to take shape, but it also became an appointment on my calendar with times, names, and a topic: The Gospel According to St. John. Proximity to our first meeting stoked my excitement. I found myself in John's Gospel for a week straight, and from multiple sources: my Ignatius Study Bible, my Great Adventure Note-Taking Bible, the Catholic Commentary on Sacred Scripture, and my brand new Bible, an English Standard Version: a Protestant Bible which has a translation very close to the Revised Standard Version 2nd Catholic Edition I'd already become quite fond of. Our first meeting was yesterday, and it was, as first meetings go, everything I'd hoped for. Everyone involved is a devoted and amazing Christian, hearts alive with a fire for the gospel.

I really love learning from all the footnotes in my new ESV Study Bible. 

The Great Adventure Note Taking Bible lets me make notes in the margin for all the meaningful things I'm learning.

I've also found a treasure trove of information about the Gospel According to St. John on YouTube. There are a few that really stand out, and I want to cite them here.

First, there is a Father Tim Peters. Based on his channel on YouTube, he's been around a long time, but I'm just now discovering him. He's a pleasant speaker and clearly a subject matter expert. While his Catholicism comes through pretty clearly, I think even for Protestant friends, this is a great find. The episode he did on John, Chapter 1 is 57 minutes long. That'll give you an idea of the depth to which he goes to explain the meaning and point out the beauty of this, which in my opinion is the most beautiful of the four Gospels.

Screenshot from Father Tim Peters's YouTube video.

Father Tim Peters YouTube John Chapter 1 

Another discovery, new to me, but not new to this "space", for lack of a better way to say it, is a fellow named John Lennox. Lennox is from Belfast, Northern Ireland. I read that he's a highly regarded and accomplished mathematician. If you ask me, he's a biblical scholar and Christian speaker and apologist. What a speaker! He's incredibly persuasive, instructive, inspirational, and on and on. Give him a listen sometime. I mean it.

John Lennox has three doctorates. Maybe diplomas don't make some people smart. John Lennox is that.

John Lennox 2014 Speaking About the Way, the Truth, and the Life 

One last cool little discovery. I had watched this cartoonish video, actually two videos, one for John, Chapters 1-12, and the other for Chapters 13-21. I think AI generated, but really good. In about 20 minutes, they give an overview of the Gospel According to John. These are really worth it if you want a meaningful but quick synopsis of what the Gospel According to John is all about.

John, Part 1 

John, Part 2 

But here's the cool part: this morning, I found the same exact videos... ta da! In Italian. I spent another 20 minutes and watched them anew, but this time all the narration and all the graphics in Italian. A beautiful crossroads of my two passions: the Gospel, and the Italian Language.

So, somewhere in all this is my excuse. I haven't spent any time on My Faith Journey for over two weeks. But, assuredly, it does NOT mean my faith journey has come to an end. Not hardly.

Have a great day, friends. God bless.

In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.